Before accepting a work request, identify what it requires and what it displaces. A useful response states capacity, an available contribution and any priority decision needed. It avoids promising a full yes while relying on a later crisis to reveal that the work was impossible.
Make the tradeoff visible
Use Request | requested due date | estimated work | current commitments | proposed contribution | decision owner. This original record is a workload tool, not a diagnostic form.
Fictional example: Quinn is asked to build a new deck by tomorrow while finishing an approved report due the same day. Quinn can review an existing deck for 20 minutes but cannot produce a new one without delaying the report. The relevant question is which task the owner prioritizes.
A colleague asks for more than you can supply
“I can check the figures for 20 minutes this afternoon. I cannot take over the full presentation. Please send the two slides you most need reviewed.”
This is a bounded offer. It states what the other person can reasonably expect.
A manager adds a conflicting priority
“The report is scheduled for tomorrow. Building the new deck will move that delivery. Which should take priority, and what date should we set for the other?”
This asks the decision owner to resolve a tradeoff. It does not pretend you can decide every organizational priority alone.
You already agreed and need to correct the record
“I agreed before checking the remaining work. I can deliver the outline tomorrow; the complete version needs until Friday. I want to correct the expectation now rather than miss it silently.”
Correction is uncomfortable, but an accurate update gives others a usable choice.
Where the book fits
Kerub's people-pleasing chapter examines buying approval by surrendering one's own decisions. Her Authorship lens also asks you to keep your part in the agreement visible. Applied here, it means representing capacity honestly rather than making an unwanted promise and disappearing. [A_EGO:6] [A_EGO:12]
That model does not establish that every request is exploitation or that every colleague's disappointment is manipulation. Examine actual behavior. Help you choose freely can coexist with a clear limit.
Consider power and safety
CCI describes assertive communication as distinct from passive or aggressive responses. E03 The scripts here are original examples; they are not a validated clinical intervention or employment-law advice.
If you face threats, harassment or retaliation, a polished phrase may be insufficient. Consider appropriate support, reporting procedures or professional advice based on the situation. Do not interpret a real risk as simply a failure to be brave.
Review the commitment afterward
Record what you offered, what the recipient understood and whether the work stayed within scope. If extra tasks appeared, update the record instead of silently absorbing them. The aim is a dependable agreement, not victory in a confrontation.