With friends, explain a specific limit and the offer you can genuinely make. Friendship does not require unrestricted access to your time, and a boundary does not require deciding that your friend is a bad person.
A worked situation: Late ordinary calls
Fictional example. A friend phones late every night. You prefer a planned weekend conversation and state that you will not answer ordinary late calls, while they remain free to seek other support.
Work through these questions: Late ordinary calls
| Question or field | Fictional completed example |
|---|---|
| Situation? | Late ordinary calls |
| Preferred contact? | Planned weekend conversation |
| Limit? | No late-night availability |
| Offer? | Saturday afternoon call |
| Follow-through? | Reply during the agreed window |
State a preference without predicting the response
For a recurring call, name the contact you can offer and the time you cannot. Ask whether the arrangement works for the friend, while keeping your own limit accurate. If the friend declines the offer, revise the shared plan rather than pretending that a boundary guarantees agreement. Use the worksheet when you need to rehearse one concrete reply.